My attempt at King's 'Two Cents'

If the saying “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” is to be believed, then I’m about to soft-soap the heck out of Larry King. For many years, King wrote a weekly column entitled My Two Cents in which he rambled on incoherently and filled the USA Today’s opinion page with non sequiturs and ridiculous reflections. Here goes nothing.

I wonder how long it will take for my puppy to be able to control his bladder and not pee on everyone he sees when he gets excited? Like master, like pooch, I suppose.

Some feel that the Electoral College is archaic and needs to be updated while...