Eric Carmen was correct
December 4, 2019
I don’t even know the words of Eric Carmen’s All By Myself, but I know the most important part of the song… The hook.
Those words ran through my head as I found myself without my family on Sunday night, as Susan, PJ, and Lincoln headed to Sidney with her parents. Poor PJ had to get his tonsils and adenoids removed because of the size of his tonsils.
It was because of his tonsils that PJ would hold on to colds longer. This year it got so bad that despite the doc-prescribed cold medicine and home remedies, he coughs so much that he threw up a few times and he even burst a blood vessel in his eye.
The cough had gotten better just in time for his surgery. I assume that it may be rough for him, given he can only eat soft foods for a couple of weeks, but to be honest, he has only eaten soft food for the last couple of weeks.
I found out that he hadn't been eating his favorite meal at Malta Elementary; cinnamon rolls on Wednesday mornings. When I found out that he had passed on his beloved cinnamon roll, it made me sad.
What made me even more sad was when I found myself home alone when the family left for Sidney. In an attempt to make sure we got the surgery done before the new year, we found ourselves scheduling the surgery on a Monday, the worst day of the week for us at the PCN to do anything. Mondays are deadline days and writing days.
So, instead of going with the family I was left behind. I thought I would love the peace and quiet, given I am searching for peace and quiet daily. But the quiet was not as good as I thought it would be. I missed my family.
I missed the boys fighting over the same toys over and over again. I even missed Lincoln crying as we put him to bed. I missed PJ worrying about way too many things for a kid his age. I missed Susan sleeping like a baby, while I struggled to fall asleep.
I missed goodnight hugs and kisses and hearing Lincoln try to say goodnight prayers. It was a lonely night and morning at the Bibbs house. Hug your loved ones for me, because for me, being all by myself, was not awesome.