To Have and To Hold: Memories of a Mongolian Wedding

Miles and time zones away from quiet Malta, Montana, on a beautiful day in August, Terri Cole made a trip of a lifetime.

She was a guest of her daughter and husband, Patty and Thom Vaughn, who reside in Helena. They started on a trek with their son, Tyler Vaughn and his wife, Anu, back to her homeland in Mongolia.

Tyler and Anu Puntsagdulam were married in Seattle in 2020 amid the Covid pandemic, and plans to have a wedding in her native country were cut short and put on hold until 2022 when the party of eight ventured to Mongolia. Tyler, Ana, Patty, Thom, and Terri were joined by Tyler's brother, Drew, Drew's girlfriend, and sister, Taryn.

They departed from Bozeman to begin the first leg of the journey on a 15-hour flight to Seoul, Korea, where they had a 24 layover. The next leg of the flight took them to Ulaabaatar, the capital of Mongolia. A landlocked nation, Mongolia has an area of 603,909 square miles.

The trek to the site of the wedding was a three-day venture that included 20 hours of travel in three vans. There are poorly maintained roads to make the journey on. Roadside gas stations are just that – there are no "conveniences or quick stop" items for sale, only gas. During their travel, they stayed in a "yurt", a tent-like dwelling. There are no restroom or bathroom amenities to speak of. Instead, women usually wear a jacket wrapped around their waist to accommodate any modesty – it's just stop, drop (your rear end) and go (on).

"There are untold numbers of partially built buildings, they aren't finished – you can look right through them," Terri said. "The Russians just left them, they (the Mongolians) were just left in a lurch"

The little towns are the leftovers as a result recent Russian government takeover activities. The country does have a small army and a couple of tanks.

Green rolling hills grace the skyline in the land called the "Country of the Blue Sky" because it has over 250 sunny days a year.

"It is similar to the south country by the Veseth Ranch, only 10 times greener. There really is a lot of water. They herd their goats, cashmere goats, yaks, cattle, and a few camels...which wander all over the road. There is a lot of honking and hollering to avoid accidents with the animals!"

Terri stated that in the 10-day excursion, she did not see one sign or indication of medical facilities or where one would go to if they needed help.

The first night they were there, they were guests of a friend of Anu's dad's, at his restaurant. They had "ten kinds of meat, including wild boar and wombat." Asked if they identified the meat for them she said no, one of the guys with them identified it for them, it is a delicacy there, "but I didn't eat it. I just ate soup."

The second day of the trip, "We went to a shrine of rocks, to observe and celebrate Shamanism. There are pillars of rocks, called "ovoo" and offerings are left there. It is a mixture of religions of Shamanism and Buddhism."

Traveling to the town of the wedding reception, Bugat, was accomplished by means of a 1950's army truck, similar to one in "M-A-S-H" and because she was the grandmother of the groom, she was allowed a front seat. Seating for others consisted of benches alongside the sides of the back of the truck which was covered. The excursion took them across a river three times, and the water came rushing in, all luggage in the back got wet, Terri's was in front and was dry.

About 60-70 yurts comprised the beautiful mountain lodge for the wedding reception. The decorations were modestly done. The wedding cake, which is actually a bread-type layered arrangement, with five or seven layers representing and alternating happy and sad, always ending on happy. There was no frosting on it and no one ate the breaded arrangement, they have very few sweets there.

The lodge and yurts had real bathrooms!

As part of the tradition of a Mongolian wedding, the father of the groom presents the father of the bride with a gift, and Thom presented Anu's father with a blanket. Tyler and Anu were dressed in traditional Mongolian wedding attire. Following the Mongolian ceremony, they then dressed in American attire for a part of the reception which they exchanged vows they had written for the renewal of their vows.

An opportunity of a lifetime was spent with family in a foreign land that will be forever held together with memories.