Permit for photos?

Take only photographs. Leave only footprints.

That’s the mantra for visiting wild lands.

Or at least it used to be.

Now the feds want to add a caveat: “Make sure you purchase a $1,500 permit for those photographs.”

Under a directive issued by the U.S. Forest Service last week, permits would be required by journalists, film crews and even hobbyists to shoot photos or film in designated wilderness areas. The new rules would even require newspaper photographers to obtain special use permits before entering a wilderness area.

But it isn’t so much the plan to charge for photos that bothers me as much as the thinking behind the proposal. What moron thought this was a good idea?

How out of touch is Tom Tidwell, chief of the USFS, to think such a proposal would fly?

And where is the problem?

Is someone posting too many cute wilderness photos on Facebook?

I can’t recall reading news stories about anyone complaining about excessive photography in the backcountry. I would certainly take notice. I’ve spent more time than most in the company of professional photographers. I know how annoying they can be. Even in the backcountry.

To compound the absurdity of the proposal is the timing -- what a stupid idea when almost everyone in this country has a cell phone camera in their pocket. Do they actually think I’m going to get a permit to take a selfie in front of the Chinese Wall? The only chance I’ll get caught is if a grizzly bear photo bombs me and I sell the picture to National Geographic. It’s all good if I can just sell the image for more than the $1,000 fine the USFS plans to charge for shooting pictures without a permit.

The Forest Service is understandably backing off from its own proposal following public outcry over the plan. That’s a little disappointing. I wanted to hear more. Like how the permit process would be enforced. Would there be Forest Service photo cops hiding in the trees, watching? Would you be able to take a photograph of a wilderness area from a distance without a permit? Is Obama behind this?

Perhaps the permit process could be better applied to photos posted on Facebook. I suggest charging a fee for photographs of babies, weiner dogs and kittens while photos of big fish, hot chicks and celebrity meltdowns be exempt.

Take only photographs. Leave only footprints.

This latest Forest Service proposal makes me want to leave something else.

Parker Heinlein is at [email protected]