One Nation, Under God

I Haven't Been in the Water Yet

It’s nearly June and I haven’t been in the water yet.

There was a time I never would have let that happen.

On the news yesterday I saw it was supposed to be 95 degrees in Paducah, Ky. I used to work at a marina near there, and when it was that hot I would start my day in the water, cooling off with a dip before opening the bait shop at first light.

By now I would have been swimming for a month already. My friends and I also made it a point to start skiing in April, the water still cold enough to give us ice cream headaches if we fell.

My wife, Barb, who grew up on Hebgen Lake and likes to one-up me, claims she used to start skiing there before the ice was completely off. The trick, she said, was simply not to fall.

Now I worry an ice cream headache might be the end of me, the shock of cold water too much to bear.

On Fort Peck Lake, where Barb and I have a cabin, the water remains too chilly to swim. Next month I might take a dip, but not now.

I blame the summer camp swimming lessons I took when I was a kid. They were always held early in the morning when the sun was still low on the horizon. It was a relief when they were over and I could finally stop shivering.

My grandchildren have no such hesitation about entering the water. They fearlessly jump off the dock without first testing the water. If it’s cold their screams reach a higher level, but they always jump in.

I used to. Now I ease my old carcass into the lake off the ladder on the pontoon boat and quickly clamber back aboard if it’s too cold. It often is.

In another couple of months, however, the water will have warmed to the point it’s no longer refreshing. I’ll be brave then, diving off the boat with abandon for those few days before the lake once again begins to cool.

Swimming season in Montana never lasts very long, especially for skinny old men.

Parker Heinlein is at [email protected]

 

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